Mar 21, 2013

Sometimes it's hard to be an Iowan

Diverting the cops is a standard tactical move if you want to do mischief somewhere else, and I suppose calling a bomb threat to a school 20 miles away could work about as well as anything else. That's what a couple of would-be criminal masterminds from Des Moines did up in my neck of the woods..

The results were non-optimum. Their bank-heist take was an employee's purse. The car they stole was recognized and chased. They abandoned it along the wild bluffs of the  Des Moines River and hid in the woods. Officers quickly found them. Homing in on chattering teeth?

Criminey. When even your criminal class apes a Three Stooges plot, you get to thinking about state pride and all.  I may resort to social climbing.  Claim to be from Arkansas or something.


Anonymous said...

Don't go shopping for a white horse. You ain't the Lone Ranger, parder. Besides,they are everywhere. The other night, a local worthy sped away from a routine traffic stop. The cops, being the curious sort they are, gave chase. Our "good boy who is trying to turn his life around" turned into a deadend street. He bailed, then turned on the cops, threatening them with a pellet gun. Not a good plan. He is recovering in the local hospital. JAGSC

Jim said...

Yeah, your point is well taken, but that kind of thing is unusual here in the peaceable corn fields. About 90 per cent of our crime news reports are dreary recitals of Barney Fife busting some kid with a couple of joints.

There a final grin in the story. Later information says the master criminals not only fled into the frozen woods, they jumped into some open water in the river. That earned them a bit of time in a nice warm emergency room before jail.