Shaking Hands with Admiral Beaufort

(Or, "Where's the Furshlugginer St. Bernard When you Need Him?")

The century-old burr oaks shimmy in the wind.  I cannot see the  road some 250 feet away.

It is timely, therefore,  to think of the admiral's classification of winds. As the Camp J day progresses, we'll work our way up the scale.

First, Force 7:  Whole trees in motion. Effort needed to walk against the wind.

Then, Force 9:  Some branches break off trees, and some small trees blow over. Construction/temporary signs and barricades blow over.

(Those are the land conditions. For a further journey into mortal fear,  see the link for parallel effects asea.)

The six inches of snow today will add to the merriment as we progress toward a predicted low of minus 15.

If you care to have your sympathy further elicited, see it live.

Theocracy 101

The Iranian woman sentenced to death by stoning may have been freed due to pressure from the slightly more civilized world, according to AFP and  the Vancouver Sun.

She was convicted of two crimes, involvement in her husband's slaying and sleeping around. The murder charge finally brought a 10-year prison sentence, but letting strange hands and whatever creep up under her abaya generated the death-by-stoning decree.

I submit that is all we need to know about governments which claim to have God's unlisted number on speed dial.

In Praise of Matt Dunham, AP photographer

I can't recommend highly enough that you look at Mr. Dunham's photo of Charles and Camilla under seige.   A less staid editor would have captioned it, "The Duchess needs fresh stepins."

This one will win prizes, and I'll give odds on it taking the Pulitzer in spot news photography.

His other riot shots aren't bad, either.

Kicking the Duke's Carriage, Oh My!

We sadly note that England has given us a disrespectful lead. It seems that London youth today have been observed kicking the carriage of His Future Royal Majesty. And on Regency Street, no less, even with Mrs. Future Royal Majesty, Camilla, aboard.

The AP determined that this event required a bulletin and a quick subsequent lede  quoting a Charlie factotum that "Their Royal Majesties are quite unharmed."

I, for one, am quite relieved.

And the AP, on it's own, reports that the couple, after speeding off, dismounted at at London Palladium to view a Royal Variety Performance,  (Judge Lynn in "Divorce Court" reruns?)  "looking quite composed."  This, too, is heartening.

The protesters are angry because Parliament, which has recently discovered that the Exchequer is still bare, plans to triple university tuition to 9,000 pounds per annum.

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I probably wouldn't have found this worth a little essay except for one factlet. AP said one protester carried a sign saying "Education is Not For Sale."

Look, you little batty English socialist nincompoop. If it isn't for sale, then what in the Hell have you parents been sweating for all their lives? Where do you think that chunk of their paycheck went every fortnight? Or that confiscatory value-added tax they forked over every time you whined for a for a pretty new waistcoat and the latest pop CD while you were in the lower forms? If it isn't for sale,  where the deuce does it come from? Your Inland Revenue Service is funded with unicorn farts, maybe?

Now, if you had said that your universities are as bloated as ours, that students are getting a bad bargain at almost any tuition level, then I wouldn't be calling you a  stoned-out, smack-brained, collectivist doowhackadoo whose economic understanding is lower than whale excretia.

And if that ain't the ever-loving truth I'll kiss your arse at Buckingham Palace during the Changing of the Guard and give you an hour to alert Fleet Street.