Poor Sean Hoare

The world media tread lightly on the mysterious death of Sean Hoare, the whistle blower who brought down the News of the World and put Rupert in the Commons dock. The eerie hush screams "conspiracy."

I suspect it starts  with Queen Elizabeth who cannot possibly be amused by world's amusement at the sorry state of the media, the police forces, and Her Majesty's entire government in Theme Park England. So the question must be asked: "What did Liz know and when did She know it?" Even if she is eventually found ignorant, it is important to remember that the buck stops at Buckingham.

So far, Scotland Yard is reporting poor Sean's untimely death as merely "unexplained but not suspicious." Quite lame.  This is the same cop shop whose bobbies were known to pocket a few extra pence by selling secrets to Rupert's minions.

Journalist Hoare ratted them out, and who knows what else he might have been ready to spill? A reporter who knew the cops were selling GPS locations of known celebrities is quite likely to have had the inside dope on PUS's and parliamentarians fond of dressing in tiny fragments of  French maids' costumes as they  waited on tables of leather-clad (Dare I use the term?) tarts (!).

The autopsy occurred yesterday, and it will surprise no one when whomever, if anyone, leading the bobbies these days reports that there's nothing to see here, folks; move along.  Further scandal could crush the Empire and, poof, there go the pensions whilst also ending the jolly good sport of flogging wogs from Capetown to Bombay and beyond. Further horror? Think of the collapse of the pound sterling when it is no longer backed by the yuan of a million Chinese persons hooked on English opium.

Whilst my research is ongoing, information from my good friend Travis McGee suggests the method by which Mr. Hoare was murdered, possibly with the connivance of Murdoch himself. The crime was quite possibly  committed with a tiny irradiated pellet which mimics the symptoms of a naturally occurring infectious disease. (cf. The Green Ripper.) 

While I do not yet argue that the dot of death was delivered by a red-haired siren with bad skin, the  possibility cannot be ruled out. As I have proven many times in the past, Travis knew everything.


  

Howzzat again, Sherf?

There's an update on the Rep. Boswell home invasion this morning, including a quote from a lawman:

Decatur County Sheriff Herbert Muir said Sunday night that he doesn’t think Boswell’s house was targeted, either because of his job or for another reason. He said it was probably a random attempted robbery thwarted in part because the robber didn’t realize how many people were in the house.


Come on, Herb. There were three people in the farmhouse -- two of them aged -- and one young man. The thug had a gun, so we presume he was prepared to deal with people.  He wasn't at all thwarted until he he found himself eyeball to muzzle with the owners' shotgun. Then he was thwarted.


Perhaps a litle practice will help you out, Sherf. Say to yourself, over and over: "The robbery and potential murder were thwarted by a citizen's private gun and a young man unafraid to use it." In due course you'll probably be able to utter it in public without hurting your head at all.

The armed congressman

I wonder how much attention the hoplophobe press will pay to this one:  A  Democratic congressman fights off an armed home intruder at his farm, thanks in part to his house shotgun in the hands of his grandson.

Well done, Rep. Boswell. Well-done, Grandson Mitchell.

Just for the record, the Boswell record on gun-control earns him an "A" from the NRA.

Bearish on America

Two days ago a big bow hunters' jamboree in the Colorado Rockies hit a sour note. A black bear swiped eggs at the camp site, then raided a tent and bloodied a boy. (He's fine, T and R.)

Reuters decided its report should include something indirectly related:

Earlier this month, witnesses reported seeing a black bear sow and her two cubs rummaging in an outdoor trash receptacle at a Burger King restaurant in Eagle, Colorado. The spectacle attracted a crowd, and at least two people were seen feeding the bruins hamburgers.

It's hard to have any long-term faith in a nation which produces even two (there were probably more) such cretins in one small town. The connection isn't hard to make: People feed bear. Bear learns people equal food. Very bad.)

Then there is the factor of knowledge transference and projection, just a fancy way of saying you can apply the lessons of one situation to similar ones. The human zipiddydoodahs hovering around the restaurant trash didn't learn the basic lesson, so they won't have a clue when we warn them:

"When you see a bunch of  elected officials hovering around the Burger King garbage, do not feed them. If you do, they'll soon be in your tent, chomping on private parts. Very bad."