Showing posts with label Politics. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Politics. Show all posts

Sep 2, 2016

Hillary says she can't remember whether she might have lied,  or, possibly,  told the truth to federal cops about what she did or did or didnt do  with classified material. She was suffering from this concussion, you see.

In other words, "Not tonight Dear. I have a headache."

Jul 25, 2016

Not that I'm a Republican or Anything, But

I am getting the damnedest kick out of the Democrats' sun dance in Philadelphia.

The usual suspects among the media Dog Soldiers of the left are beside themselves. Until he spoke, they told us Bernie Sanders would calm his frustrated little Leninites and everything would get cuddly on the convention floor and the boulevards outside. Sorry about that, Chief. 

Now they're pinning their hopes on today's speech by Michelle Obama, the unelected First Mama whose concern for her family consists of incessant grumpy demands that we eat our veggies. Even the Sanders people are probably still pissed about that. They like their Twinkies and Doritos as much as anyone else.

Their backup plan, in case Michelle can't spread enough Balm of Siliad around the hall, is Senator Liz "Medicine Woman" Warren.  Liz, sometimes known as Pocahontas,  is heap diverse. She tellum Yale she Cherokee maiden -- well, female anyway -- and will join the council fire for much wampum so Yale can count coup and show great white majority how affirmatively active it is.

Summing up we have:

--Michelle, an ineffectual has-been,

--Liz, a system-working hanger-on to the great diversity drive, and

--Bernie, who probably still wears tie-died undies and has fantasies about being locked in a VW van with Mama Cass Eliot. 

Hillary, I don't think this is going to work for you.

   









Apr 12, 2016

Flash

Courtney Love has just endorsed Hillary Clinton.

One finds oneself unsurprised, doesn't one?






Sep 25, 2015

Boehner and the Asses

I have no more respect for John Boehner than for any other institutional  politician. Nevertheless, he was one of the better tacticians of the breed. A stern dedication to ideology is admirable, but Boehner fully understood politics as the art of the possible.

The instant issue is giving the left wing a massive political talking point: "The Republicans shut down the government, making you miserable, just because they hate women who want to talk to Planned Parenthood and maybe undo the result of a few moments of passion."

Boehner is as "pro-life" as anyone, if that's a criterion for "good" conservatives. He just saw the results of a shutdown drama as a huge political  loss for conservative (and, to some degree, libertarian) Americans.

It took the stage-surprise of his resignation to reveal the idiotic contempt in which deliberative politics is held by some of his reluctant stable mates. For instance:

...and Rep. Tom Massie of Kentucky said the speaker "subverted our Republic.I think it was inevitable," Massie said. This is a condition of his own making right here.

Ass: Noun describing persons of mean disposition, prone to seek the limelight via personal slurs on better men than themselves. Hello, Tom.

---

This Planned Parenthood crisis, acted out in the Center Ring, is probably the  most valuable thing that has happened to that organization in decades. It couldn't buy such attention for any sum of money. A massive slice of America now believes the issue is shutting PP down.  Not a chance.  All the pro-lifers are demanding at this point is that their abortion program should not be paid for, directly or indirectly, by taxpayers who hold a strong moral position that abortion is sinful.

The sin of the matter can be worked out among the factions -- those who long for a return to the back-alley coat hanger, those who chirp that abortion is just one more means of benign birth control,  and the more rational thinkers somewhere in between. Just leave the IRS out of it.


















Aug 9, 2015

Trump

It's not easy to write seriously about this guy, especially if you think he is performing a useful role in American political discourse.

Limited but still worthwhile is Trump's  absolute rejection of the mealy-mouth sputterings of politicians willing to risk offending no one, tiny men and women terrified of riling some identifiable group. Black people. Women.  Fundie religionists. Humanists. Cat lovers. Art lovers. Gun lovers  -- probably descending downward to whatever internet group exists to mock  folks who eat hummus. None must have the tender hymen of virgin ears pierced.

He came into this campaign with the idea that millions are fed up with limp language of PC. His polling numbers tend to prove him correct.

But the poor, sad egomaniac's insight stops a world away from the notion that plain speech, blunt speech, is not the same as stupid and vile speech. For instance, he could have said of John McCain:

"From what we know this guy endured pain we can't imagine under Communist torture. For six long years he was, in fact, a military hero as most people define the term. It's too bad people confuse this with the kind of wisdom we need in a political leader, balh blah blah.

That was his point, exactly,  a valid argument on which Trump committed seppuku by expressing it as mockery, intentionally cruel sarcasm displaying a strong hint of envy.

Mexicans are rapists. 

Nonsense, of course.  But he could say,  the illegal immigrant population from Latin America includes a high proportion of thugs.  Even that will inflame passions, but it is a proposition which can be debated. It can be tested for truth. If found true it can be a base for policy. As Trump vomited it out, it is a flash-bang grenade tossed simply to make his 15 minutes last longer and longer and longer.

The coy reference to Ms. Kelly's vagina was probably the final cross-stroke in Trump's ritual suicide. Rag-on remarks have been around forever but, in my life experience, anyway, always taboo in any but the most testosterone laden gatherings, even in the years before our intellectual betters decided that that open debate should be forbidden except when framed in words which carry zero chance of offending some group or even some one.  (That's the way it is now ...trigger warning...  honest, Injun.)

A Trump with his mouth under even small control would have said something like: Ms. Kelly, I speak my mind without a lot of editing for mushy political correctness.  Maybe I go to far sometimes, but I think your question reflects a stupid approach to journalism. The campaign is about huge issues, and whether or not one candidate sometimes uses words too strong for you is not one of those issues. Grow up."  

The furor about stupid journalism and Kelly's alleged infantilism would have been almost as raucous,  but it would bear on things we need to think about, namely stupid journalism and  arrested-development teevee personalities.* It is far more important than her menstrual status.  Goodness, I'll bet the nation can avoid thinking about her cycle for months on end. If it can't, what the Hell. We might as well elect The Donald because we deserve no better.


*I do not necessarily accuse Megyn of those faults






May 24, 2015

Second Edition: The Other Iowa Hustle (or) The Republicans are Coming! The Republicans are Coming!

An update of the Original report.  Six  new candidates, or probable/possible candidates, have been added. They're marked with an asterisk.  One original, Paul Ryan,  is retained as a matter of record after claiming he's not running. I count 16 still-panting hopefuls on the list at the moment.

(A second edition of the Democrats is in the works.)


-----

Every four years we in Heartland Center get pestered to death by He or She Who Would Be The Ruler, but at least it is a bipartisan contagion. You know, like ebola.

You have the left-wing authoritarians in the previous post. Herewith the right-wing authoritarians, making due allowance for Dr. Paul. He has inherited a certain amount of respect for the ability of  people to govern their own private affairs without undue armed supervision from social misfits with  government credentials.

As with the Democrats, the Republican list of Iowa Caucus annoyances is offered with no -- or at least  minimal -- editorial comment.

---

Josh Ellis BUSH, born Feb. 11, 1953, in Midland, Texas; banker, real estate promoter,  entrepreneur, former governor of Florida.

*Benjamin Solomon CARSON, born Sept. 18, 1951, in Detroit, Michigan; pediatrician.

Christopher James  CHRISTIE, born Sept. 6, 1962 in Newark, New Jersey; lawyer, governor of NJ.

Rafael Edward CRUZ, born Dec. 22, 1970, in Calgary, Canada; lawyer, U.S. senator for Texas.

* Cara  FIORINA born (as Cara Carletion Sneed) Sept.l 6, 1954 in Austin, Texas; business executive, politician.

*Lindsey Olin GRAHAM, born July 9, 1955, in Central, SC; politician, senator for South Carolina.

Michael Dale HUCKABEE, born Aug. 25, 1955 in Hope, Arkansas; Baptist preacher, televangelist, teevee personality, former governor of Arkansas.

*John Richard KASICH, born May 13, 1952, in McKees Rocks, Pennsylvania; politician, former congressman (Dist.12), governor of Pennsylvania.

*George Elmer PATAKI, born June 24, 1945, in Peekskill,  New York; lawyer, politician, former governor of New York.

Plyush JINDAL, Born June 10, 1971, in Baton Rouge, Louisiana; biologist, politician, governor of Louisiana.

Randal Howard PAUL, born January 7, 1963 in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania; ophthalmologist, senator for Kentucky.

James Richard PERRY born March 4, 1950 in Paint Creek, Texas; USAF C-130 pilot, salesman, politician, governor of Texas.

Marco Antonio RUBIO, born May 28 in Miami, Florida; lawyer, politician, senator for Florida.    

Paul Davis RYAN, born January 29, 1970 in Janesville, Wisconsin; politician,  congressman (Dist. 1) (Not running  as announced in January)

Richard John SANTORUM, born May 10, 1958 in Great Falls, Virginia; lawyer, politician, former congressman (PA-Dist. 18),  former U.S. senator for Pennsylvania.

*Donald TRUMP born June 14, 1946, in Queens, New York, real estate promotor, teevee personality.

Scott Kevin WALKER, born November 2, 1967 in Colorado Springs, Colorado; salesman, fundraiser, politician, governor of Wisconsin.

Nov 6, 2014

The pollsters look silly now. Obama looks sillier than ever.  Pelosi looks silliest of all in vowing to hold onto her Boss-Democrat job because of her sterling performance in the 2014 House campaigns.

But no one will look sillier than some of our new Republican leaders if they play true to form. i.e. get elected, start scouting around for nations to "build," tune up the abortion drums, and schedule four hours per day for schmoozing mega money which -- with the right tax breaks, subsidies, and artificial  markets  -- might just become available to their next campaign fund.

Ladies and Gentlemen, you campaigned as champions of smaller government, reduced intrusion into personal lives, and a less adventurous policy of sending our kids off to get killed in far places.

Put up or shut up.

Nov 4, 2014

Off to exercise my franchise this morning. The plan is to vote for all libertarians on the ballot and ignore all races without one.

With a single exception, Joni Ernst, the lady who cuts 'em and makes 'em squeal.  She is  a socon, neocon Republican, but she's in an apparently close race with a real howler of a statist Democrat. She also carries "S&W 9mm," and that tips the scale.

I'll take my shower after I vote.

Oct 30, 2014

Six-Gun Colorado, Damn Good Jazz, Hog Balls, and Other Political Notes

-- Democrats are in considerable trouble in Colorado, and reporters are stumbling over themselves with explanations. You can, however, wear out a pair of reading glasses looking for any MSM mention of Governor Hickenlooper's assault on the Second Amendment.  He had the backing of Senator Udall who wants to disarm citizens in all 50 states. Both are in electoral trouble, though my crystal ball tells me the Hick will squeak it out. The Denver Moms (and Dads) Scared Shitless of Guns and Most Everything Else, Too are laying low. They recognize that Colorado is still far more John Wayne than John Denver, and those old boys out along the Dolores River will vote.


---

--Here in Iowa, Michelle Obama is stumping around, trying to pull Bruce Braley's balls out of the fire. The race to replace Tom Harkin is very close, but  RCP has Joni Ernst looking like a winner. I've liked this campaign. Ernst skewered Braley for his stupid and condescending remark about Sen. Chuck Grassley being a mere Iowa farmer who never practiced law.

She became the Hog-Ball Lady,  "I'm Joni Ernst and I grew up castrating hogs on an Iowa farm."  Braley has not yet recovered, maybe because he's trying to prove he can get elected with the most incompetent handlers in the business.

Item:  For months the Braley campaign massed-mailed slick cards featuring a huge picture of Ernst, who happens to be a very attractive woman. The text was so subdued that people tended to think it was a pretty good piece for her.

Item: That mailing ended eventually, replaced by similar cards with photos of a paunchy congressman quickly going to jowls.  If elections are beauty contests, Braley conceded even before the swim-suit competition.

Item: Then Braley or his wife threatened to sue a neighbor whose chicken walked across their yard.

Item: Then Michelle spent most of a speech  intro identifying him as "Bill  Bruce Bailey." Which reminded me of how much I loved Ella Fitzgerald. Somebody needs to remake her classic into "Bruce Braley Won't You Please Go Home." It would scan just as well. (You should click the link; it will do your heart good.)

---

--We lost a very good man a few weeks ago. Libertarian senate candidate Doug Butzier flew his PA 46 into the ground trying to land in Dubuque. He was polling the Iowa LP's usual 1 or 2 per cent, but was earning props as level-headed candidate  who was being pretty effective in promulgating the liberty message.

---

You will be shocked, shocked, I tell you, to learn that before too long I will be saying some nice things about a Democrat who will turn up on the TMR Iowa Caucus list. Jim Webb.


Sep 29, 2014

The Other Iowa Hustle (or) The Republicans are Coming! The Republicans are Coming!

Every four years we in Heartland Center get pestered to death by He or She Who Would Be The Ruler, but at least it is a bipartisan contagion. You know, like Ebola.

You have the left-wing authoritarians in the previous post. Herewith the right-wing authoritarians, making due allowance for Dr. Paul. He has inherited a certain amount of respect for the ability of  people to govern their own private affairs without undue armed supervision from social misfits with  government credentials.

As with the Democrats, the Republican list of Iowa Caucus annoyances is offered with no -- or at least  minimal -- editorial comment.

------


Josh Ellis BUSH, born Feb. 11, 1953, in Midland, Texas; banker, real estate promoter,  entrepreneur, former governor of Florida.

Christopher James  CHRISTIE, born Sept. 6, 1962 in Newark, New Jersey; lawyer, governor of NJ.

Rafael Edward CRUZ, born Dec. 22, 1970, in Calgary, Canada; lawyer, U.S. senator (TX).

Michael Dale HUCKABEE, born Aug. 25, 1955 in Hope, Arkansas; Baptist preacher, televangelist, teevee personality, former governor of Arkansas

Plyush JINDAL, Born June 10, 1971, in Baton Rouge, Louisiana; biologist, politician, governor of Louisiana.

Randal Howard PAUL, born January 7, 1963 in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania; ophthalmologist, U.S. senator for Kentucky.

James Richard PERRY born March 4, 1950 in Paint Creek, Texas; USAF C-130 pilot, salesman, politician, governor of Texas.

Marco Antonio RUBIO, born May 28 in Miami, Florida; lawyer, politician, U.SW. senator for Florida.      

Paul Davis RYAN, born January 29, 1970 in Janesville, Wisconsin; politician, U.S. congressman (WI - Dist. 1)

Richard John SANTORUM, born May 10, 1958 in Great Falls, Virginia; lawyer, politician, former congressman (PA-Dist. 18),  former U.S. senator (PA).

Scott Kevin WALKER, born November 2, 1967 in Colorado Springs, Colorado; salesman, fundraiser, politician, governor of Wisconsin.




Hustling Iowa -- The Democrats

So far, it is simple. No one is officially running for the Iowa caucuses nod to be a White House candidate. Then again, it is complicated, because every self-styled political celebrity who ever looked in a mirror and said "Hi Mr. (Ms.) President" is sniffing around, looking for a hay bale to sit on and go "Aww Shucks" to us.


The TMR contribution to this operation begins with a baby step.   Six Democrats score a point or better in the major polls. They're listed below, just the facts ma'am.  Changes galore can be expected.

I'm starting with Democrats because they are usually the major enemy of liberty. I'll get around to the Republicans before long. Know thy most important enemy.

Of the six,  all have either been here recently or have organizations in place. They do a little retail demagoguery, but the immediate goals is to endorse and throw money at state-level politicians  in hopes of getting a helping hand when the caucus campaigns take off.



----




Joseph Robinette BIDEN;  born Nov. 2, 1942 in Scranton, Pennsylvania; lawyer, former Delaware senator, vice president.

Hillary Rodham CLINTON; born Oct. 26, 1947 in Chicago;  lawyer, former "first" lady; former New York senator,  former secretary of state.

Andrew Mark CUOMO, born Dec. 6, 1957 in Queens, New York; lawyer, governor of New York.

Martin O'MALLEY: born Jan. 18, 1963 in Boston: lawyer, former Baltimore mayor, Maryland governor.

Bernard SAUNDERS; born Sept. 8, 1941 in Brooklyn, New York; former congressman, mayor, student activist.  (Sanders calls himself an independent but caucuses with Democrats.)

Elizabeth Ann WARREN;  born June 22, 1949 in Oklahoma City, Oklahoma; lawyer, Massachusetts senator, former Obama consumer  "protection" official.





Aug 8, 2014

Circle the wagons

The Indians are coming!



Senator Pocahontas has scouts in Iowa, you know, the place where we decide who you can vote for. They're beating her tom-tom at the state fair despite -- we'll use her white-eye name here -- Liz Warren's solemn statement that she is not running for president.

Her Massachusetts dog soldiers aren't buying that. Maybe we, also, should be leery of her solemn statements because she once solemnly avowed Cherokee ancestry. She billed  herself as a native American on the Harvard faculty list. That allowed Harvard to  pimp itself out as a diversity bastion.

When it became obvious in her 2012 campaign that she is about as Injun as Martin Luther, she skedaddled back and forth and sideways until she finally came up with a dandy Kumbayah evasion:

Warren said she listed herself as a minority because she wanted to connect with “people for whom native American is part of their heritage and part of their hearts.” 

And she did it for at least 10 years.

About the only question regarding her forked tongue is: "Poky, did you lie about it at first -- when you applied to Harvard -- in order to score heap big affirmative-action hiring points?"

She said no.  Ted Kennedy said he "dived repeatedly" in a heroic effort to rescue Mary Jo.

---

A small political datum lies here. Someone is willing to bet a little time and money that Hillary won't run. Hillary will, according to all present signs, but if she doesn't >big war whoop<.












Jul 23, 2014

Sky blue; grass a shining green; birds melodic; mood sad

The morning is too beautiful to waste with worry, but it's too late for me, and I invite you to share my misery.

During coffee cup #2 I was wandering through the bizarre world of political journalism, sort of getting ready to plan my contribution to the art with periodic reports on the state of Iowa's caucus  circus. That's where we tell you the names of acceptable presidential nominees.

The brute demographic ugliness engenders the worry.

The resulting practical advice is this: Keep buying .22s, even at $50 a brick. Don't be afraid of stressing out your Visa account, even to the point of using plastic to buy plastic, Glockenpoppers,  LCPs, SR9s in recall-often calibers.

Because she's the Queen Apparent. Hillary, of course, the pants suit who promises to take things away from everyone except successful Arkansas cattle-futures traders for the common good. I personally believe that to be the only political promise of the century which she will strive mightily to fulfill.

In a walk Hillary Rodham Clinton beats every Democratic name the pollsters can fish out of the slimy rain barrel. Nominated, she beats one Republican after another, though by an apparent fluke Rand Paul betters her by a point in one poll.

So tell me it's too early to make judgments like that. You say that in politics, anything can happen? Thank you. I didn't know.

However, let's add one more sad molecule to the festering mix. At this moment, more than four out of every ten polled Americans believe that another Chicago  ("You didn't build that!")  pol is doing a great job of administering American affairs.

Could be you could go to $75 a brick and still find relative future happiness, 2017 through 2025.






Apr 24, 2014

The Hog Ball Lady

Joni Ernst is drawing more attention lately, but I'm told her rallies are a little funny-looking. All the guys sit with their legs crossed.

"I'm Joni Ernst and I grew up castrating hogs on an Iowa farm," she reported in the now-viral teevee spot. The conclusion is left to the viewer : Ergo Joni really needs to be a United States senator, so let's all send her some money."

---

It's part of the 2014 through 2016 Iowa political circus. The ultimate purpose is to decide which president-thing-hopefuls you will be allowed to vote for if perchance the nation survives  the remaining 32 Obamanation months.

It's a dreary show, a reprise of the banal. but this time without the interest of a Ron Paul semi-libertarian presence. Joni's cutting remark may be the only noteworthy snark of the revue, and she must concede some credit to  congresscritter Bruce Braley. (Joni is in a GOP primary fight; Bruce has been slated by the White House Office of Iowa Affairs and will be the statist nominee.)

They both want to replace Tom Harkin who is retiring to his Bahamas home after 30 years of pretending to represent Iowa as water carrier for the Ted Kennedy  senate tribe. (As a frame of reference, he was elected to the senate when Pete Rose was still hitting homers for Cincinnati instead of dodging process servers; the same year Madonna was still singing on American Band Stand. And, get this, he is still Iowa's junior senator.)

Braley's handlers made the fatal mistake of letting him speak without a teleprompter, and he decided to bitch slap our senior senator, Chuck Grassley,  as an "Iowa farmer who doesn't even have a law degree."

Joni's surgical line is a direct result of Bruce's ad lib, and Braley operatives spent the next three nights foetally under their blankies, sucking thumbs and wondering if things were as bad in the private-sector job market as they were hearing.

---

And there it stands as a soft April rain nurtures the fresh grass seed on the Camp Jiggleview grounds; as the Trail  (phhbbbtt)  Trial Lawyers Association rallies with massive Citizen's United cash to redeem their artless colleague; as the evil Koch Brothers lurk behind the barn, trying to decide which of the primary Republicans would be their best senatorial buy.

---

All of this overlays something I need to get to before long. Libertarian forces are in disarray around here this season. They had a decent presence on the state GOP Central Committee, but it has just been recaptured by the church-basement faction.

Danny Caroll is the name you want to Google. I know him only second-hand, but I hear he's a very nice guy if you can get him to quit quoting Genesis 1:1 in response to any question, from farm bills to Russian expansionism to making Janet Yellan slow down the goddam printing presses.

Feb 17, 2014

Vote Vet

I always miss Travis McGee but especially so when I want to sort out some newish thing.

Of course, to miss Trav is also to miss Meyer, the hairy economist down F pier a ways. Trav could deal with a Puss Killian all by himself but  needed Meyer for political and economic challenges. Even a womanizing free-lance detective can use a little logical positivism once in a while.

My friend L* alerts me to the Veterans Party of America which seems to be some sort of evolution of an earlier (c. 2003--20??)  "veterans" party which didn't make it.  It has recently published its platform. On first reading it looks more libertarian and anti-statist  than anything the majors would dare put on paper.  Better yet, some of the more important parts of it seem actually doable.

In my guise as pure political operative, I'm forced to tell the VPA, "rotsa ruck." Our America is the place where third parties go to be ignored, then die. The logic of their arguments has nothing to do with anything because they don't have and can not get the billions needed to create a nice image on the electric teevee.

Still, as a citizen, I'll be a happier if the VPA platform gets all possible exposure and discussion. Starting with you, Trav and Meyer. Whadaya think?

---

*Interesting person. Along with another pretty girl some years ago, she started a business more or less from scratch. It thrives and has created jobs without, I believe, ever having asked government for a dime in subsidies, tax holidays, special tax exemptions, guaranteed markets (c.f. ethanol mandate) or the like. While she would never state it so vulgarly, I think her message to federal, state, county, and local authorities was: "I intend to do right, so please get your big hairy bloated bureaucratic asses out of my way so I can get some work done."




Feb 5, 2014

...And, By The Way and FWIW, The NRA Gives Him an "F"

I woke up a few minutes ago with that acute depression that overcomes a journalist when he suddenly realizes he missed the lede. Glance back at the previous post making fun of retiring congressslug Bob Andrews who went zero-for-646 over 23 years.

Now, 23 years is 8,395 days. Bob's proposed 646 new laws over that span represents an ambition to create one new federal law every 12.995 days. Cut the guy some slack, figure he took a Sunday or two off to get together with his homies to watch the ponies run at Meadowlands, and round that up to 14 days.

The meaning is that every other Monday morning you would need to check the Congressional Record carefully for a new Bob-dictate detailing what you must do, or not do, on pain of federal civil or criminal prosecution.

Suppose  he had been successful. Imagine how the Washington Post would have  praised him; the most "effective"  legislator in the nation's history.

And the other 534 would be green with envy, racing like Man-O-War to catch up.


Feb 4, 2014

Less is a helluva a lot; zero is sublime

I propose a massive private fund-raising drive to build a marble monument to Bob Andrews. A big one, right smack in the middle of the National Mall.

The liberal New Jersey congressthing is retiring after nearly a quarter century eating high on the federal hog. In all that time he proposed 646 new federal laws.

None passed. Not one.



And if that doesn't make him the most useful slug in American political history I'll kiss your arse in the Capitol Rotunda and lend you money to hire Rachel Maddow for live teevee commentary.

Jan 26, 2014

Get Ready for HIllary

Or, "Quick, Henry, the Flit!"


---

Political operatives have a running Q and A gag: "How far is it to Iowa?"  The answer is ""(xxx) days." meaning the time left until the Iowa caucuses.

For one more presidential election cycle, we Hawkeyes will choose a president for the rest of you. More accurately, we will narrow your choices. It is altogether fitting and proper that we should do this because of our exceedingly virtuous character and the depth of our wisdom.

Last time around I blogged the damned circus for more than a year under a separate label (Iowa Caucuses 2012) and did my best to keep that part of the TMR objective.  Mostly objective, anyway.

Because some actual working pros in the journalism and political consulting rackets  said they found it useful, I guess I'll try to do it again.

I'll change the format slightly. I made up the last one as I went along, and while it told the story, it was slightly awkward, for me and for the folks who used it. Basically it will be a list, a quick reference -- the dude's name, age,  party, residence, date became a candidate, date dropped out and so forth.

I try to include everyone, from the most serious contenders right down to the 47 guys in big shoes who pile out of a Volkswagen in the center ring.

---

So why am I telling you now? What  difference does it make??!!  Hillary made me do it. She's here. The overture is playing.


Jan 12, 2014

Love your bean counters

They run around in nice suits and polished shoes, but it is rewarding to think of them as  noble Transylvanian peasants. They tolerate a certain degree of evil, but when blood suckers cross the line, it is torches and pitch forks in the night.

I refer to auditors, and I all but worship them. You see, they try to keep the vampires in check and preserve that portion of my life blood not legally available for theft by the politicians and their familiars in the bureaucracy.

The latest instance from these parts has some officials down in southeast Iowa scurrying to come up with proposals for prison reform -- nice buffet meals, thick mattresses, etc. They might actually get it done, being as they are employees of the Department of Corrections, our state jailer.

State Auditor Mary Mosiman has ferreted out close to $800,000 in "improper expenditures " in one of those godawful "public-private partnerships." The actual bite is higher because some documents went missing before Mary's militia knocked on the door. How much higher we don't know, but I always apply a rule of thumb:  Double reported theft to approach the actual total.

The honey dipping apparently began when some mid-level DOC nabobs decided to create, or foster, a not-for-profit 501c3  to help it administer its community corrections programs. My God how the money rolled in, from the state, the feds, and other sources. The state guys and their private-sector pals set up a cozy  interlocking directorate and started an energetic game of catch. Bundles of money flew around the offices, no one worrying overmuch about who had the surest fielder's glove.

Sure enough, after about four years their budget started showing unexplained shortfalls. They could hide them for a while (Toss the money faster, Homer!) and succeeded in getting a c. $600,000 special appropriation from the legislature. That raised some eyebrows. Then, get this, one of the local boss men quickly went back to Des Moines for another $800,000.  (Once I heard of a guy who left his driver's license on the counter of a Stop 'n' Rob that he stopped and robbed.)

To much even for Des Moines, the highest levels called Mary and said sic 'em.

Having sicced, Mary was good enough to turn the file  (pdf)  over to the attorney general's office.  It would be nice if he does his job as well as she seems to do hers.

In fact, if I ever run across her, I think I'll give her a nice hug if she'll let me.