It's all set, gang. Florida and Nevada hang their heads in repentant shame, meaning the Iowa Caucuses will not be held on Christmas Eve: The schedule:
January 3 -- Iowa caucuses
January 10 -- Hew Hampshire primary
January 21 -- South Carolina primary
January 31 -- Florida primary
February 4 -- Nevada caucuses
Those of you with a bent for history will wish to note that Iowans caucus on the anniversary of Martin Luther's excommunication by Pope Leo X, leading directly to development of of the church basement dinner and, ultimately, invention of the crock pot.
In New Hampshire, Republicans will vote on the date of Thomas Paine's publication of "Common Sense." They will choose Mitt Romney, proving that Paine's literary effort ultimately came to nought.
The South Carolina vote celebrates the birthday of John M. Browning, PBUH. He deserves better.
The Florida geezers will interfere with what should be a solemn commemoration. On January 31, 1606, the English executed Guy Fawkes and his buddies for trying to blow up King and Parliament. C'mon, Your Lordships. Should have been noll prossed or, at worst, tried as a simple misdemeanor.
The Nevada caucuses occur on the date Benjamin Palmer patented the artificial leg. This is politically important, leading as it did to a Chicago development where Democrats were inspired to patent the artificial vote.