It's a matter of soil balance

His Ineptness goes to the Rose Garden today. The purpose? To tell us all what a wonderful president he really is.  The occasion is the fifth anniversary of the fall of  Lehman Brothers, a one-time leader in organized crime. He will report that his wisdom saved the nation and the world from economic collapse, that he has ushered us to the portal of peace and prosperity. He. Himself.

This speech is good news for the nation to the extent that the National Park Service can cancel it's rose fertilizer orders for several months.

The bye-bye elections

(1) I was going to write that Weiner and Spitzer have been retired to stud, but that might strike some readers as distasteful, so I won't.  I report merely that New Yorkers now have the opportunity to be ruled by a man who may not know how to take a cell phone self-portait and another one who doesn't need to buy it.

(2) Everyone who cares already knows about the Colorado recall, but so far  I have seen no remark about a side benefit. When you boot an antigun leftist hand-wringer you also eliminate a  more generalized pest. Coloradans have reduced by two the number of legisthings likely to screw around with their lives in other ways -- creative new taxes and fees, business regulation, that sort of thing.

The perils of old age

Sometimes you have to feel sorry for frustrating the healers. I visited them today for the first time since about 2010. They greeted me like a team of Draculas. Fresh meat. Certainly this dude needs treatment for something.

An hour later, the patient  chemically analysed, questioned, poked, prodded, and palpated, they reached their scientific conclusion. "(Sigh)  Come back and see us in a year."

The secret of course is vigorous daily exercise, a strict vegetarian diet, and, as I have mentioned a time or two, dynamic virtue and uncommon purity of thought.

Say, Tipper, is that the ice man I hear coming?

Or, There Goes the Northwest Passage Again as the Arctic freezes over in blatant defiance of the wishes of former Vice President Gore and clueless climate alarmists everywhere.

The "Mail" -- a British tab -- gets a big laugh from printing that it's stogy competitor, the BBC, carried reports that the Arctic Ocean would be ice free by the summer of 2013.

This is all very satisfying, but it plays havoc with my water ski franchise on Point Barrow. Besides, it means New York City will continue to exist.
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