Apr 8, 2009

An American Dream

Three hundred miles east of the Somali coast, pirates attack and capture a cargo ship flying the Stars and Stripes and manned by Americans. The word spreads, and the U.S. Navy  sternly warns that it is aggressively trying to decide what to do. In Washington, the Obama White House is issues two press releases, one  reporting that the President will monitor the situation and another confirming that he is bravely  monitoring the situation.

Meanwhile, 20 America merchant seamen aboard the  decide they don't need no steenken Navy, nor White House either. They  arose  like the spirit of John Paul Jones to capture the pirate leader and send his fellow sea thugs scampering.

Spot news reports this hour say that is exactly what is happening, give or take a few trivial nuances. So may we honor our private enterprise sailors above all.  This is the stuff of legend. 

We might also kill a little time  writing to the Pentagon and the White House. Tell the fellows that we possess a navy and its commander-in-chief for reasons other than handwringing indecision. I mean, like, we ain't French.

EDIT: Looks like one of those nuances is the captain bobbing about in  a small boat, hostage of the three pirates who got away.



JohnW said...

I don't see where the Bainbridge has any visible yards, but surely there's a loading crane or boat boom that could be put into service?

Jim said...

Bainbridge should have davits big enough to haul in a fat 28-footer, but they're a complicated pain in the ass for what I think you have in mind.

Bainbridge will have at least one savvy chief boatswains mate and a good shipfitter. Together they could lash up a heavy boom and cable contraption to do just the fun thing you're thinking of.

(Pick the damned thing up, swing it inboard and retrieve the captain, then outboard again to play bouncy -bouncy with the turds, someting like a larger-scale 17th Century Puritan ducking chair. That is what you meant, isn't?)

JohnW said...

No, I was thinking more along the lines of having the skinnies stretch hemp. The AM reports here today are that the captain managed to escape during the night but was recaptured before the OOD could give the order to open fire. At least I hope that's the case. I despair.

Anonymous said...

Pirates in Africa. Where is Teddy when we need him. Roosevelt, of course, not Kennedy. JAGSC